Simrita Kaur can’t remember the last time she bought new clothes that weren’t a ‘necessity’. ‘As the younger of two sisters, I grew up wearing hand-me-downs,’ she says. “Of course, back then, it wasn’t a conscious decision, just a way of life.’ But as the now-39-year-old educationist from Bengaluru grew older, she began to feel a certain wantonness in buying new clothes beyond the absolutely necessary. ‘That’s not to say I don’t like dressing up,’ she adds. ‘I quite enjoy it! I just don’t see the point of buying clothes when there are so many clothes sitting unworn in people’s closets.’
Simrita has extended her love for secondhand clothing–and making them her own–beyond just daily life and even to special occasions. In December of last year, she found herself invited to a big fat wedding. For someone who’s neither big on occasion wear, nor keen on buying, this was a bit of a daunting task. But Simrita rose to the occasion, and decided to put out a tweet, asking for leads for borrowing or thrifting, within Bengaluru, for appropriate outfits. Her first responder–within a very short time of putting out the tweet–was a complete stranger. And thus began Simrita’s project of curating a wedding wardrobe, entirely of clothes that were borrowed–from friends and strangers.
In India, especially, a country that loves celebrations and festivals, buying new and expensive clothes for festivities is the norm. While borrowing and swapping within the family have always been popular, as have ‘thrift’ buys, the idea of ‘secondhand clothing’ is mostly frowned upon. ‘For hygiene reasons’, being the most common excuse. And then, there is the allure of shopping, retail therapy and festive sales. How does one navigate so much? Take a cue from Simrita.
‘Start with your inner circle.’
It’s always the easiest place to start: Your comfort zone. ‘For a very long time, my borrowing circle was basically just few of my friends,’ says Simrita. ‘It was also convenient, because I knew their wardrobes well enough. But then, especially after I realised the environmental impact, I became more intentional, reaching out to closed circles on Instagram, and finally, openly asking to borrow on Twitter.’ What she also discovered, along the way, was that borrowing and swapping was a great way to grow that inner circle. ‘Sunanda and I found each other through a tweet, but when we met, we realised we had so much more in common than just photographs in the same lehenga,’ she says. ‘Building relationships is also essential to keeping the borrowing game strong.’
‘Make shopping your last resort.’
When it comes to occasion wear, which is going to live a long time in your closet without being worn, borrowing is an excellent alternative to buying. ‘For me, borrowing may have started as a convenience thing, but over the years, I’ve realised it’s better than shopping in so many ways,” says Simrita, who finds shopping anxiety-inducing. ‘I find trends and the excessive choices available overwhelming. Especially for occasions that are out of my comfort zone–like weddings. Borrowing helps you narrow down your choices and options. And it allows you to try out new things and make decisions in the comfort of a home environment.’
‘Don’t be shy.’
‘Be adventurous,’ asserts Simrita. ‘Be shameless about asking people and being specific about what you’re looking for. If you see someone has something appropriate for an occasion you need something for, don’t hesitate to ask if they’d be OK lending it to you. I think it’s also important to have the gumption to try out new things. Sometimes people see you in a different light, and it’s good to be open to ideas and try out new things.’ Because you’re not buying, it’s not something that’s going to be stuck in your wardrobe, lying unworn, forever. Borrowing also affords you the opportunity to try mix-and-match, with a larger playing field. A perfect example is how Simrita teamed Sunanda’s lehenga with a blouse from her friend’s cousin and a dupatta from yet another friend. ‘I got to try something I wouldn’t otherwise,’ she says. ‘And I love how my friends often end up being my stylists!’
‘Be respectful.’
‘What is given is given with a lot of love, and we should honour that,’ says Simrita. ‘Be honest about it, if something doesn’t fit or is not your style. When someone gives their clothes to you with love, they’re expecting to see them–in photographs. So if you’re not going to wear it, let them know. And when you do wear it, make sure you send them photographs–in real time. They already feel part of the occasion–help complete that experience for them.’ Clothes must also be returned with due diligence. Ensure the clothes have been appropriately cleaned and there is no sign of damage, before returning. It’s no biggie if you do need to spend a little on repair and maintenance. ‘A blouse I’d borrowed from a friend had a slight rip, which she pointed out to me, at the time of lending, so I got it darned before wearing it,’ reveals Simrita. ‘Before returning, I rechecked to ensure it hadn’t ripped again.’
‘Be generous.’
Borrowing cannot always be a one-way street. ‘Just because you’re borrowing instead of buying new, doesn’t mean you be a freeloader,’ says Simrita. ‘I may not have a lot of clothes to lend back, but if I do have something that works for someone’s requirement, I never hesitate to offer it up. But there are also other things you can lend–like books. And sometimes, even your time.’ When Simrita got back from the big fat wedding, which was in Nepal, she made sure she got a token of thanks for every single person who helped her create her favourite wedding looks. ‘I do believe the universe responds to generosity–what you give out is what will come back to you,’ she signs off.
What are your thoughts on borrowing clothes for occasions? Tell us in the comments.
